


i need you; please help me

by perhapssoon



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Friends to Enemies, M/M, Platonic Relationships, Self-Harm, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-25
Updated: 2018-01-25
Packaged: 2019-03-09 04:48:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13474026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/perhapssoon/pseuds/perhapssoon
Summary: Charles doesn't want to know.OrThe Soulmate AU where people have their soulmate's countdown to their death imprinted on their arm.





	i need you; please help me

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I did this.

When Charles was seven, the timer appeared. He only spotted the zeroes on the end before he pulled his sleeve down in fear of seeing the whole number.  
Because it counted down to his soulmate's death.

He hadn't met his soulmate yet -- at least that's what his mother told him -- and he wasn't sure that he wanted to now that he was branded for life.  
His mother and father both had timer, sometimes leaving them exposed for Charles to see. They both had at least another 20 years ahead before either of their deaths, and honestly, Charles wasn't that worried yet.

As soon as he could, he asked his mother to tape down the spot, not willing to see it when he didn't need to. It didn't help that she made a small gasp and a clicking noise when she saw the timer.  
Charles didn't think much of it then.

Most people in his school covered their own timers because none of them were ready -- or mature enough -- to know of death. They spent their time going around, trying to find their soulmate, but Charles just went on with his life. Because his mother said to make most of the moment before it disappeared, and besides, he would meet his soulmate soon anyway.

In eighth grade, he met John Laurens. A boy with large eyes and an even larger smile. Whose laugh made Charles' heart leap into his throat. Unlike the others, he had his timer exposed, black ink branded onto his skin, for when the ultimate tragedy would strike his life. And Charles saw that whoever his soulmate was, they had a good seventy years ahead of them, so John had plenty of time to try to find his soulmate. Charles knew he wasn't John's soulmate when an argument turned them into bitter enemies. He didn't think of him in love anymore -- only in hate.

In twelfth grade, he met Aaron Burr, whose soulmate timer was already at zero, her last thought of him branded onto his arm: _I love you_. Aaron never really talked about his soulmate whenever he and Charles were alone, but Charles could see that he was still hurting. The only details he knew was that her name was Theodosia, she died in a car crash, and she was very sweet and forgiving. Charles didn't get romantically close to Aaron, recognizing he wasn't ready, but stayed close friends, even as they graduated and went to college.

In his third year of college, he met Samuel Seabury. The shy, strongly opinionated nerd who spent most of his time doing work or giving speeches. He, quite surprisingly, left his soulmate timer open, showing that his soulmate had fifty years ahead in their life. The two fit together like puzzle pieces, and balanced each other out, from Charles having trouble with getting into fights with other students to Sam needing someone to pull him away from his work to go relax. Charles started to wonder if they were soulmates, but there really was no way to find out until either of their timers reached zero.

And then Sam started getting scars.  
Charles didn't understand what was going on. Cuts started appearing in Sam's flesh: red and angry against his pale skin. And it didn't help that John Laurens was Sam's roommate because otherwise, Charles would ask him to keep an eye on Sam.

And he had his own problems anyway: his mother had died, but the soulmate timer on his father's arm still had a few years left, which led to a whole investigation about it. Charles stopped going to his parents' place for the holidays and spent his time with Sam or in his dorm room.

And Sam seemed to be getting worse. John even appeared in his room one night for a few minutes -- the last time they had a talk that wasn't an argument was back in eighth grade -- and told him that Sam seemed suicidal and they needed to refer him to a 'therapist or something.'

Charles agreed, but they decided to talk to Sam first -- this was the first mutual agreement since eighth grade -- and went back to his dorm room.

Sam wasn't there.

They went to the library, and scoured every corner for their friend, but Sam was nowhere to be found.

Until Charles heard a rumor floating across campus that someone was standing on top of the dorm roof.

A crowd had gathered there, the lone figure standing on the edge above them, silhouetted against the night sky.

Charles didn't even need to look to know it was Sam; he recognized the ever-present scarf he loved to wear.

Dashing up the fire escape stairs, he found Samuel inches away from the edge. In a blind panic, he ripped off the tape that covered his timer, and found that there were only a few seconds away from zero.

And then Samuel launched himself off the roof.

He seemed to fall in slow motion, silently, arms spread wide like he was flying, coat and scarf fluttering behind him. John reported to Charles later that he was smiling.

And he hit the ground.

Sounds erupted around Charles, deafening, like wailing, until he realized it was his own screams.

A medical crew converged on the body, gathering around it for a moment before carrying it away. Behind Charles, Aaron Burr burst onto the roof and led his friend away.

Numb with grief, Charles let himself be taken downstairs and outside. He was aware of people talking to him but he couldn't hear anything. He looked down at his arm.

Six glaring black zeroes were scribbled next to a note: _I'm sorry._

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not crying, you are.


End file.
